VBS & C.L.I.M.B. On Mainstreet

I just got home from C.L.I.M.B. (Young adults' Bible study) and VBS (Vacation Bible School) earlier. Don't really feel like blogging; partly because there's too much to talk about and I don't want to pick and choose what to write, and also because I'd much rather clean out the container of cold buffalo wings that's sitting next to me right now.

VBS today was awesome. It's the fourth day now that I've been working with those first graders and I think we've all really warmed up to each other. Today this kid whose name I keep forgetting kept hugging me and telling me how I was his favourite teacher. Of course that was a nice thing to hear, but I didn't want to revel in that. To be honest, the greater reward was seeing the other kid who has been so quiet hiding in his shell all this time slowly come out of his comfort zone. On Monday J just kept sitting there without much emotion on his face. So I prayed that God would use me to help him feel God's love. Bit by bit, little by little, I would just do or say little things to cheer J up. I would purposely call him out in class to let him know that I recognise his existence. And thanks to some miracle God worked, he actually started smiling and dancing yesterday! I was even more astounded today when I saw him try to speak to another kid next to him. And that smile! That smile is so priceless......

I never thought I'd find so much pleasure in other people's children.

I know that sounds weird, but children are just not my thing! They aren't the first people I usually try to hang out with. I used to think they were noisy and annoying. I'm okay with my own cousins or little brothers, but why would I want to bother with other children right?

Now I see that all children are precious in God's eyes. Once I was a child too- and it took very dedicated and caring adults to understand that all I needed was for someone to recognise my existence. All the bad things that I used to say or do that drove adults up the wall was really a cry for help. I was really trying to say: "HERE I AM! I EXIST!" but felt like nobody was listening.

I see now that all these children feel the same way. Some of them may have had their voices beaten or yelled out of them. I may never know. But what I do know is that while I'm in their lives, I want them to know and remember that God loves them. And because God loves me, I can love them too.

After VBS, I immediately went to a short C.L.I.M.B. meeting which was unorthodoxly held by the black ball fountain by the Lansdale train station. We were there to hand out free bottles of clean water to remind people that millions of people go without clean drinking water daily. Not only that, but we were also there to share a bit about the C.L.I.M.B. ministry at our church and what we do.

The usual suspects were there- teenagers, loiterers, people waiting for buses on the way home...

I pray that God will grow the seeds that we planted in their hearts tonight.

So even though I didn't physically do much today, I feel as if I've been working a lot. Working for God that is.

Yet instead of feeling drained, I'm feeling a sort of...... late afternoon sweetness. I don't know what else to call it. I just took a cold shower and it's 37 Celsius out and I'm sitting on my armchair about to swallow all those delicious buffalo wings. I'd say life is good. I did my part today.

How nice it is. This peace, this joy! I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Thank you God!

VBS & Running

For this whole week, I am volunteering my time for Vacation Bible School (VBS) which is happening from 18:00 to 20:30 every night at the church. The kids who come range from preschoolers to eighth graders... I think? And I'm there to help with the first graders (6-7 year olds).

I must say, even though kids aren't the first thing that would naturally pop into my mind when it comes to ministry, I've definitely gotten a lot out of the past two days. Since I knew that kids weren't naturally my thing, I prayed before VBS that God would give me the patience and guidance to deal with whatever situations came my way. And to my utter surprise and amazement, God has given me so much more.

I see so much potential in these children. I see their hearts and minds and what they think and long for. But most importantly, God has given me a heart for the children- especially the ones who are quiet and timid. I love to draw them out in conversation and to see some kind of emotion flicker across their faces for a moment. Now I truly see how rewarding a child's smile can be.

The cool thing is that, the kids aren't the only ones learning things from their time at VBS.

I was feeling very low today, having disappointed God once more. I was so scared that I was starting to backslide and didn't even feel like praying for forgiveness anymore. I thought to myself- "God isn't going to keep forgiving me. He's probably sick of me slipping and falling all the time". I felt worthless and weak. Degraded and stupid.

But when I was sitting among the children listening to the lesson today, the speaker said something that almost brought tears to my eyes.

She said: "Does God love you when you do something wrong? Yes! Does God like it when you keep doing wrong things? No! But remember that no matter what happens, God will always love you."

I prayed in my heart that the little boy sitting next to me who had been silent most of yesterday and today would feel God's love. Yet at the same time, I felt my heart jump at this simple message.

Wow. God loves me no matter what!

I need more and more of this assurance each day. Ever since two weeks ago when I've really been engaged in prayer with C.L.I.M.B., things have not been going too smoothly. While God is answering prayers left and right, Satan is also trying to get in between us.

I know how important it is to keep praying for everyone else, but I also really hope that someone out there is praying for me. I really need it.

With that said, a heatwave is headed our way towards the end of this week, which means I won't get as much running at all. On Monday (it was 33 Celsius out); I felt really really really dizzy by the end of my four-mile run. The drive back was brutal because I felt so weak at times it was hard to turn the wheel. I think that's an indication that running in the predicted 38 Celsius weather this Thursday would not be a good idea.

Till then...