Answered Prayer

I am so amazed this morning at how God always begins answering my prayers before I even finish praying them!

As I was getting ready for work today, I prayed that God would soften my hard heart and open doors of opportunities for my mom and I to be "okay" again. I also prayed for my upcoming missions trip, with an ongoing hope in my heart that God would always provide. 

Well, would you believe it. 

I walk out the bedroom door and my mom (who hasn't really spoken to me in a month or so) out of the blue says she's going to give me some money for the trip. 

:O !!!

AND she said it in a really non-threatening way (which is hard to believe too). 

Woahhhh..... 

But even then, I could feel my heart cringe. I didn't want to forgive and I didn't feel like accepting the money. I didn't feel like talking to her at all. My skin crawled. 

Dear God, why do I feel this way? I thank you for opening doors of opportunity and channels of communication between us, but I also pray that you would step in to my heart right now and mend whatever needs fixing. Help me to be gracious, humble and submissive. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen. 

First Interview

I went for my first interview in Singapore today. 

Boy, when I finally put on all my clothes and looked into the mirror, my professional-looking self kind of scared me for a moment. I thought about all the times I watched my mom get ready for work when I was little, and here I was, preening myself just like she did when I thought she looked so "big" and "adult"! 

The interview didn't go amazingly well because I was a little bit too nervous. The interviewer kindly gave me some honest feedback afterwards and her comments such as "too fidgety" and "not enough energy" only served to highlight what I'd already suspected. 

Not all is lost though. I am really glad that my first interview did not go smoothly, so that I will be better prepared for my next one. 

Who knows?

I hope in a month or so, yours truly will be fully employed. By then I'd probably look back on this day and smile. I'll probably also miss my carefree (extended) summer days. 

Tomorrow is going to be an important day. I am going to spend some serious time with the One who will give me a REAL interview someday... You know, the one where He decides whether I go to heaven or hell......

My mind is heavy but my heart is light. 

Praise God for all the things He's done in our lives! Even the "bad" things! I am praising Him for them because "we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28)

God Is So Wonderful

When we pray, we ask God to do the work we cannot. So much more gets done when we bring our weaknesses to Him, when we confess that we need Him to be here. When we knock and He answers, that's when strongholds are torn down, evil flees and His great light shines through!

I am so in awe of His power and mercy...

Why would the God who created this universe bother to listen to my pleas? Me, this little speck of nothingness. Here today, gone tomorrow. And not just that- He deemed me valuable enough to suffer and die a shameful death on the cross! Him, Jesus Christ... The One who did not deserve to be mocked, spitted on and crucified... He willingly gave Himself up as a sacrifice for us, because He loves us so much......

Thank you God, for everything You've done for me on the cross. Thank you God, for pulling me out of the deep darkness and shining Your light in my soul. Thank you God, for the guidance, comfort and love of the Holy Spirit.

Without You, I am nothing...