38 Weeks

I went to see the gynae again this morning for my second CTG scan. The last time was pretty uneventful, but today, she determined that my cervix has already begun to dilate! About 1-2cm. Eeek... I'm not sure I'm mentally ready to deliver! I met Rosa who is about 4-5 months pregnant yesterday and she told me that a friend of hers had a 10 minute delivery for her first baby! That really gave me a lot of hope!

However, I also received a bit of scary news. My gynae will be away for three days starting on my due date, so hopefully I will go into labor either before or after then! I don't feel very comfortable having some other gynae monitoring the labor process.

In other news, I've been feeling really heavy these days. My weight was 71kg this morning. Most times, it feels more like 100kg. Walking for more than 30mins usually means I'll be bedridden for the rest of the day. It also hurts to roll sideways in bed because of how heavy my belly is.

I'm really grateful for all the small and big sacrifices that people around me have been giving to try to make life easier for me. Most of it is from Jerry of course... But I am also really thankful to my relatives who have all done nice things to help make this pregnancy better.

It's just a matter of days now I suppose. I am on 38 weeks today so... Anytime now and I will get to see his sweet little face :D

Nesting Instincts

These past few weeks have been nothing short of stressful. I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant going on 35 this Saturday, and until about two weeks ago, I still had nothing ready in our room for the baby!

It wasn't until I threw a fit that Jerry finally decided to hop into action. Within a day, he rearranged the entire room by taking out our closet and a chunky low table/drawer. That was just the first step. Next, we faced the challenge (or rather I did) of cleaning the whole room. And by that, I mean that I actually wiped EVERYTHING- including all the walls, down to the very last wire.

I'd been shopping around online for IKEA's Sundvik cot, which we both saw in the store and liked. But for some time, we couldn't find any decent secondhand Sundviks either on Carousell or Gumtree. Until the last minute!

We got a new cot from Carousell for 150 SGD, including the mattress. Fortunately for us, the seller's twin babies had refused to sleep in their cot since they were born. IKEA's selling this cot at 249 SGD and a pretty banged up version in their As Is section was selling for 130 SGD without the mattress in both cases. So I'd say we got a pretty sweet deal!

After much begging and pleading with a husband who really didn't see the need to get a new chest of drawers, he finally relented and we got this (brand new) Hemnes from IKEA. It's probably the most expensive thing we've bought for the baby so far, apart from the package with the gynae. I think it cost 269 SGD? Everything else, including the diaper changing pad you see on the drawers, I got secondhand through Carousell :)

As I'm getting bigger by the day, I've been finding it really hard to get out of the house. I just feel so unmotivated when I think about having to take the MRT. Seats are not always guaranteed and the weather is just too hot and humid.

I just don't feel like my old self these days. I did not use to be so... spoiled. But this last trimester is no joke at all. I just find myself wanting to rest more instead of pushing myself to my physical limits.

Also, the occasional urge to vomit isn't something that I want to deal with in crowded Singapore.

Thank God that Jerry is very understanding and tries his best to make things as convenient and comfortable for me as possible. For example, I know he doesn't like to drive, but he would drive me anywhere if I asked, just because :)

Once the drawers and cot were in place, I set about unpacking my suitcases full of baby things. And just like a daughter of my mom, I ironed EVERYTHING after putting them in the laundry. Including the baby's handkerchiefs...

And then labelled everything...

Ironing his clothes wasn't as exhausting as actually sorting through them and organizing them methodically in my head. And actually ironing made it easier to fold and pile them neatly in the drawers.

I still have a few random things to get, but otherwise, I think I'm set!

I can see him kick through my clothes very clearly now. Every hour or so, I would get either a strong shove in my right belly (from his feet), or pummeling, or some awkward stroking action from within my belly. I like it when I'm being still, but it's definitely weird and uncomfortable when I'm trying to do some *ahem* business, or eat.

Anyway, I know his days in my belly are numbered and I should enjoy what's left of them. 

Life is going to change for sure, even as it already has!

21 Weeks

What other mummies have been telling me is true: I am starting to really enjoy feeling my baby kick me.

It felt weird at first and I wasn't used to it for the first few weeks. Whenever he kicked me, it would give me a little shock because I wasn't expecting it. But these days, it feels more natural to me.

Today as he kicked my lower right tummy, I could see the movements through my skin. I quickly reached for my phone to try to take a video but it was too late. I'm sure I'll get to catch him in action someday though!

In the meantime, Jerry has been extremely patient and accommodating to my *ahem* emotional/mental needs. Being a skater himself, he totally understands how much I miss the skatepark. This weekend, he agreed to let me put on my skates just for a little roll around the skatepark. Although I didn't go pumping in the combo bowl, he did (reluctantly) let me go down a flat ramp twice just so I wouldn't feel so miserable. It sounds silly, but just being able to put on my skates did so much for my mood. For the most part though, I just stayed on flat ground and avoided the skateboarding/BMX kids.

But dear baby, although mummy is dying to skate again and can't wait till you're out of the womb, I'm determined to enjoy what few months I have left with you inside me. I hope you'll enjoy the skatepark as much as we do, because if you don't... Well I'm sure you will :)

Kicking Away

My little cutie pie has been kicking and kicking and kicking away in my tummy since this morning. I think he wakes up every two hours now just to stretch his legs and feel all over my insides. I was standing in the train this morning, daydreaming and almost forgetting that I'm pregnant when I suddenly got a small stab in my lower abdomen. It caught me by surprised and I jerked my head down in time to see his second punch pop through my dress. It was a very surreal moment. I almost wanted to ask the person next to me, "Did you see that?!"

I guess I'm starting to feel a queer sort of tenderness towards my baby. I don't know what that overpowering motherly love is supposed to feel like, but at the moment I'm more curious about what he is going to look like and what kind of personality he's going to end up with. I guess you could say that I'm very curious to meet him as a person.

Jerry is also starting to warm up a little. Before he was able to feel the baby move, I'd say that he wasn't as interested in its development. Men are such visual creatures. But ever since he's been able to feel his fluttering kicks, I can feel Jerry's tenderness grow alongside mine.

I'm almost reaching the end of my nineteenth week now and I already feel like time is flying by. Before we know it, the baby will be here and our lives will forever be changed. It's scary yet exciting at the same time to think about! In the meantime, I intend to enjoy what's left of my relative freedom :)

Pregnant & Reading

This has been the most exciting year so far! I got married, turned 25, and now I'm expecting. Talk about major life changes.

My first trimester was tiring. I felt sleepy and nauseous all throughout the day. They really should have just called it "all day sickness" instead of morning sickness. 

This is me at 17 weeks.

My belly really started showing sometime around 15 weeks actually. That was also about the time I stopped being able to wear even my largest pair of shorts. Luckily I had already ordered maternity shorts and pants from ASOS a month ago. They came in really handy when I needed them.

Some of the bodily changes that I've been experiencing recently is a little bit of weight gain in the other areas of my body. Though I think that's probably due more to my switch from a very active lifestyle to a somewhat sedentary one. I haven't been skating or playing DDR or running at all. My exercise during the day usually just consists of walking or jogging after a bus. I really miss skating though. I feel gross when I don't have a good sweat everyday.

I've also been more gassy than usual. Passing farts almost all the time now. The bad news is, they're mostly stinky ones :P (sorry everybody)

This is me last week, at 18 weeks. 

Last Wednesday was the first time I felt my little one moving for sure! At first I thought it was just gas, but the movements were too deliberate. I've been feeling him move frequently during the day now, especially after meals. Must be the noise from my digestive system that's waking him up.

Then today, I could actually feel him move from the outside when I put my hand on my belly. He gave it a good shove and it was weird/cool/wonderful all at the same time!

In preparation for what's to come, Ms Pang recommended that I read this book, Baby Wise. I'm halfway through it at the moment, but I find it to be extremely useful in giving concrete tips on how to schedule sleeping and feeding times. I also love that the writers of this book have Christian backgrounds (I bought this at SKS, a Christian bookstore in Singapore).

I've been hearing from many different mothers and mothers-to-be on what they think is best for newborns. I've also had my own experience with caring for babies to look back upon. All in all, I'm very happy with what I'm discovering in this book. I agree with its principles and it makes for a pleasant read altogether. And of course, I would highly recommend it to anyone who is interested :)

Another book that I'm reading is Sacred Marriage and this was recommended by Kim who is also reading it now with her husband. Because their relationship is such a good example to me, I thought, I'd better read what they're reading too! So since i was gonna pick up Baby Wise from SKS, I got this too.

The funny thing about Christian books is that, they ultimately all lead back to the same thing, or in this case, person.

With a title like Sacred Marriage, you'd probably expect the content to be quite different from books that are written for singles right? But what I've found is that whether you're talking about marriage, or struggling with addiction, or trying to build a church, or striving to be a holy single, the ultimate purpose of all of these experiences are still one and the same; that is, to become holy, or more like God.

Sacred Marriage purports that marriages can be like a refining fire, one that is intense and at times painful, but is necessary to mold us into a people set apart for Him.

I'm also halfway through this book right now and I'm sharing what I read with Jerry as I go along.

And that's all the updates I have for now.