Normal Day

I'm a little bit tired.

I had a lovely daydream today. I dreamt that I went on a picnic wearing some warm summery black dress. I climbed to the top of a cliff overlooking a small lake. There were old trees everwhere and my cat next to me. I just sat there and drew pictures all day listening to this song. The evening brought friends and a large barbecue with wings, steak, baked potatoes... the goods. The night brought fireflies, stars and somebody wrapped up in a blanket with me.

Why am I scared of this coming summer all of a sudden?

Chinese New Year is still not over eh? I love that we take fifteen days to bring in the new year. For me however, it's quite over. Sadly so. There isn't anybody here besides me and my mom who could celebrate it in the family.

We got a two hour delay for school this morning because of the snow and rain.

Classes couldn't really go on as usual because many people didn't turn up to class. I liked the casual discussions we had instead of structured lessons. I always seem to learn more at those.

Track was a mess as usual. My shins, knees and ankles are still being bitches. I was being a bitch.

Sometimes I feel like I'm living in a painting.

Just a weird wavy liquid feeling that I get in my head when I remember that nothing's certain. I couldn't go to church today. I'm not sure why.

I feel like sitting here forever.

Maybe it has something to do with being in a big space all alone.

Sometimes I wonder what the world would've been like if Eve never ate that apple. Would we all still be running around naked in that nice little garden? What would we do with ourselves if we didn't need to work, or if giving birth wasn't painful? What if we all spoke the same language? What if we could walk next to God on earth and hold a conversation with him? What would I say?

When I think about life sometimes, it makes me so tired.

But at least we have the beautiful moments to live for and sustain us.

I've been wondering recently about how my life would've turned out to be if I never left Singapore. To be honest, I can't even imagine. Too much has changed in the past three years.