Sunday, June 30, 2013


I am struggling. God knows I am. 

Doing the right thing is always difficult, but you want to know what's REALLY difficult? Thinking the right thing too. 

I just got off the phone with Talia. Did our usual weekly praying for each other thing. 

I have been feeling weak all week (HAHHHH). 

But today takes the prize for "killing me softly". 

*cue sad song*

I feel ripped apart by my stupid emotions, my wild imagination and my silly brain. I'd like to think that at the age of four and twenty, I would have outgrown certain immature teenage tendencies. But I guess not. The struggle is back with a vengeance and my life is on the line. I see two paths before me and the urge to walk on the broad path to destruction is overwhelming.

But look at me now. 

I'm walking away... I never knew it was even humanly possible pour moi. But it is, through Christ!

Through Christ... 

What would I do with myself if I did not have Him in my life?

And with all that abstract mumbo-jumbo that I just garbled out up there, I shall finish with a quote by Jim Elliot: 

"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose."

Friday, June 07, 2013

Birthday Party

My birthday party took place almost a week ago; yet here I am, blogging about it like the major procrastinator I've become. 

On that day I was panicking a little because I wasn't sure if there was going to be enough food. I expected almost fifty people to show up in the evening. 

Thank God Shirley was able to help me during the day. We did SO much work just shopping and later, chopping all the ingredients. I couldn't have done it without her and my mom! (And my little bros whom I tricked into helping me haha)

Four straight hours of cooking. Phew!

I was late to my own party. People were dialing my cell but I had it on Do Not Disturb mode. I was just in such a hectic rush to get all the food, drinks, etc. ready!

Eventually, I got some time to settle down. People arrived and mingled together like I hoped they would.

Poor Shirley also finally got to sit and relax. I'm not sure if she enjoyed the food though. It's kind of hard to really enjoy food you spent so much time cooking!

My salsa was a success and I wished there were leftovers that I could keep in the fridge or something.

Ah yee surprised me with a major delivery of pink and red balloons! 

I look happy here but actually I'm feeling rather bittersweet about turning twenty-four.

Mango cake from Bengawan Solo. Just like my eighth birthday. 

Surprise surprise. Tricia (whom I know through the arcade) and Michelle (whom I know through rollerblading) were actually schoolmates! 

The world is totally small. 

My new aggressive skates arrived the day before, just in time for my birthday! And the big pink bag next to it is filled with presents from disobedient friends who disregarded my note about NOT buying me presents!

Still, most of them followed my "guidelines" and I was quite touched at how many people decided to get me stuff after all. 

I feel that after 21, you don't really need to be receiving presents. The greater gift is always the opportunity to give to others instead of receiving. That is when I am the happiest. But a few presents don't hurt that's for sure :)

I think this will be my last birthday party in a long while. I THINK.

This last one was tiring enough and I feel really weird celebrating my own birthday these days. I don't know, it just seems kind of lame celebrating your own birthday. Maybe I'll just throw random "we don't need no reason to celebrate" parties in the future. I love having people over and organising such fun events. 

So that's all for a little summary and maybe I'll have some energy left over to blog about other stuff tomorrow. 

Till then!