I got up at 09:00 and managed to do most of my errands by 11:00, then homework all the way until 17:00.
Near 20:30, I headed to the restaurant Uzbekistan in Northeast Philadelphia for Maria V's 20th birthday dinner.
The restaurant was full as always.
The girls.
Potato salad and super awesome bread for starters.
I don't know what this dish is called but it was like the Russian version of super oily chinese fried rice. It had carrots and mutton in it. The taste wasn't bad but it was so filling that I couldn't eat anymore after two small helpings.
Birthday girl eating the shashliki (shish kebabs).
Pardon the brightness... This was my favourite dish of the night: fried sliced potatos with dill, garlic and salt.
I love candid shots.
I wasn't sure if I wanted to go out at all today because my funds are running low and there's a pile of homework waiting to be done. I'm still not sure if it was a good choice or not, but time will tell.
I did pray before going in, that God would keep my big mouth shut and not let me say or do anything that displeases Him. At times I feel like I could have exercised more self-control, but then I guess my refusing to go clubbing with them after dinner made a clear enough statement.
Or did it?
Argh... How does one live in the world and yet not be in it?
Sometimes I think it's just so much easier to stay home and not go out with any non-Christians at all. That way I won't need to be uptight about whether I'm being influenced by the world or not.
But I really don't want to become an aloof and unreachable Christian either. I don't want people to feel like they can't ask me about serious things because I will give them a guilt-trip or the "Jesus Talk". I don't want to be a "holy" person without any love!
I realised that this may be a perspective that people have of me, that I am unapproachable.
i guess that's why I'm making myself hang out with people more often, instead of avoiding them...
But there's always the question of balance. How do I live God's way while being around the godless?
I know there is no grey area and I cannot make one up either. If I choose Christ I must live Christ-like in every manner of life.
Oh God, I just feel like such a baby these days. Help me to understand Your ways and keep in tune with the Holy Spirit!
.....................................................................................................................
About the friend whom I said I was going to keep some distance from, well, things are better now.
I'm not sure if it's because we don't see each other a lot, maybe just once every two weeks.
But God had me understand that this really is a lesson in patience and love.
There really is no cure for bad relationships other than God's way of patience and love.
Among other things like hope, grace, faith...
I can only rely on the Holy Spirit to give me strength now in all circumstances because being patient and loving someone is more difficult than draining on ocean or climbing ten Mount Everests.
Not that I've attempted either feats... Anyway...
I was trying to explain to someone about the concept of Biblical Love the other day and realised that I myself have not truly loved another human being, not even myself.
In simple words, I told him that love is basically willing to sacrifice everything that you hold dear for someone else, no conditions or explanations needed.
My friend who is a non-Christian very quickly responded that he would give up his life for his family members and close friends, but he wanted to know the reason and whether he would have a wife, children, a job, etc...
And that made me think deeply about my own concept of love.
Have I truly ever made a painful sacrifice for someone else unconditionally?
Even if we start with the most basic person, my mother, I would probably have to say no. We have more of an "exchange program" going on than a "free for all". As in, I still listen to her or do things for her after the words IF or BUT is said.
IF I'm free, I'll do it.
BUT I'm too tired, I can't do it.
IF I'm upset, I will try...
Always the IFs and BUTs!
But God never said He'd die for us on the cross only IF we repent of our sins and confess He is Lord. He simply died and that was it. He gave us the free choice afterwards to decide what we wanted to do with His sacrifice- either take it or leave it.
Imagine going through torture and pain for someone whom you may or may not know will accept your sacrifice? Someone who by their very nature is your enemy? Who belongs to the other side?
I mean, people get mad when others don't RSVP to their Facebook event invitations (I get annoyed sometimes) because it "messes up their plans".
Jesus didn't wait for our RSVPs. He simply took his leap of faith (2010 years in advance) that I would accept His invitation.
That is true love.
And I'm happy to say that He is my true love. I truly did fall in love with God because it was only when I loved God's ways unconditionally, following His Word without saying IF and BUT, that He came to live richly in my heart and soul.
However loving God is not enough, because He commanded us to love others as well...
And I guess that's the stage I'm at in my Christian life right now- learning to love others.
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