Saturday, September 25, 2010

Getting Baptised & Thoughts On Cross Country

Yesterday was a special day on two accounts: firstly, because it was the first day of autumn and secondly, because I got baptised.

The moon shone so brightly that it looked like daytime even at 23:00.

I got baptised in somebody's backyard. They generously loaned us their hot tub for the four baptisms that were to take place in the young adult service group. Two other people were baptised first, then me, then someone else.

Before actually being submerged underwater, I was to sit in the tub in front of everyone else and just share a bit of my journey with Christ and why I wanted to be baptised. I was so nervous and overwhelmed by the two baptisms before me that I was crying even before I got into the water- so I don't even know what I was saying during my testimony. Something about being obedient to Christ now...

After sharing my testimony, Jay- the young adult pastor said something like "In the name of the Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit, I now baptise you... I declare you now dead to sin", as he said this he pulled me backwards so that I was completely underwater, "AND ALIVE IN CHRIST!"- and that's when he pulled me back out of the water.

When I came out I suddenly felt my limbs go weak and I was crying so hard. I just sat there in the tub crying and crying... But yet I felt so glad.

I never felt the need to be baptised before until maybe about half a year ago. I guess God was just prompting me, letting me know that baptisms are an outward expression of faith and also a step in obedience. If there is no student above his/her teacher, why should I not be baptised when Jesus himself was?

Anyway, I'm so grateful for the experience and it was everything awesome in my imagination and so much more... I am excited to see what's next in my walk with Christ!


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Baptism took place yesterday in Hatfield, Pennsylvania.

This morning however, I had to drive two hours back up to New Jersey just for cross country practice.

See the picture below?


If you look in the distance, you can see New York City and the Empire State Building jutting out towards the right-centre of the picture. That's the view from the Pulaski Skyway on a usual clear day.

This however, is the view of New York City in the horizon as I drove over the Pulaski Skyway today.

Can you see the Empire State Building jutting out anywhere?


No, right?


And mind you, in this picture, I zoomed in a lot more than I did in the previous picture.

The difference lies in the fact that today, the New York Metropolitan area received a severe haze warning. The weather report sent out an advisory for people to stay indoors and refrain from strenuous exercises between 15:00 and 18:00.


As you can see from the above picture, the haze was really thick today. It reminds me of pictures in Beijing during the 2008 Olympics.

Did my track coach care that there was a severe haze warning?

Nope.

He thought it very queer of me to ask if practice was cancelled today.

I really felt like screaming at him. I don't get it. He cancelled Monday's practice because we're getting our team photos taken FOUR hours after practice and he doesn't want us to look sweaty... But he won't cancel today's practice even when our lungs are at risk?

Practice was so horrible today because many people couldn't breathe, especially those with asthma. I really can't stand this kind of irresponsibility!

I suppose this tirade stems from a deeper dissatisfaction that I have with the coach. Halfway during a hard practice the other day, he just gave us another "long distance sucks and I don't care about long distance at all" speech. It completely demoralised me for the rest of that day and I just got so pissed off going to practice after that. He made me feel as if my hard work on the track didn't matter at all.

There are other things as well... But they are too technical to discuss. I think only distance runners who have ever trained under a knowledgeable coach would understand what I'm talking about. Not even my own teammates know what I'm talking about. (He tells us he's having us taper for Indoor season right now when our Indoor championships are in FEBRUARY! Our cross country championships aren't even until five weeks from now!)

I find myself getting so frustrated once again with his coaching methods that I feel as if I were slipping away from the happy place that I just got to in running.

I love running cross country, but listening to your coach and teammates constantly talk about how much they hate it eventually makes you hate it too.

But I don't want to hate going to practice!

Oh I don't know what to do.... I really don't.

The two other distance runners who truly love cross country are on the boys team and they've told the coach that they want to train under a different schedule now- because my coach is giving us sprinting workouts that are not suitable for long distance. The boys advise me to do the same before I ruin my season by getting injured or being too tired to race.

I wish I could!

At least the two guys have each other to run long distance workouts with. I only have myself. No other girl likes to run long distance- they all detest running anything above three miles. I don't blame them, but I do wish so much sometimes that I were on a good distance team with a coach who has at least run before in his life. And I don't mean running to catch the bus.

Anyway, this is all I have.... and I know I should be grateful for it.

I just think sometimes, what if? What if I were in a different team? Would I still be running these times for my races or would I be faster? How much faster?

I feel like I lost something- but that's because I choose to think that way. And what do I really know anyway, right?

I know I gained a lot too. Being in this school has given me an athletic opportunity that I may not have had in another school.

Well I can't have everything I want and that's that. I don't know what's worse- running on your own or running with a team that hates running.


Drove back to Pennsylvania again right after practice. Traffic jam all the way!

God, please grant me more patience. I think the traffic is not as tiring as my impatience with other drivers. Please take that away. I am so sick of it. I don't want to offend You anymore!

:/

And goodnight :)

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